Thursday, April 11, 2013

J is for Judging

I'm not the judge. - Joel Osteen

Being judgemental is one of the things I wanted to fix about myself. Who am I to judge another by any standards? That's not my job. I think this is one of those bad habits that we pick up as a kid. Everyone has their own, reasons, struggles and beliefs that guide their actions and words. I don't know what they're going through so how can I judge?

On the other hand you have to walk a fine line because you have to be enough of a judge to determine whether or not to allow another person into your life. To some respect you do need to pass judgements, but in this case you aren't judging the person. What you are judging is their impact on your own life and then deciding what you are willing to put up with.

It's a fine line to draw in that sand and one that I know I have to be constantly aware of. There is another type of judging, though, that I have to be just aware of.

2. You are all things. Denying, rejecting, judging or hiding from any aspect of your total being creates pain and results in a lack of wholeness. Joy Page
You are all things. ~ Joy Page

Judging myself even more harshly than I judge others is a huge fault in me. You'd think that when you're taking an inventory and deciding what you want to improve about yourself that part of that process would be judging, but it's not. Passing a judgement on yourself isn't fair or nice because we are often our own worst critic - usually a very unfair one.

Yes, I want to hold myself to a certain level of behavior, but I am not a bad person when I fail. I'm not a mean person because I give into petty feelings and bitterness. I'm not stupid because I forgot something or did something that showed a severe lack of judgement. What I am is only human. This all goes back to acceptance - I have flaws and that doesn't mean I'm any of the bad things I think of myself at those times.

Passing judgements on yourself is a sure way to create pain in your life. Think about what you're saying in your head. Think about the judgements that you've passed on yourself and what would you think if someone said those things to you? A random stranger or a close friend. How does that make you feel? It makes me feel horrid and if I want to be a better person I need to think better thoughts. Don't you agree?

Being your own worst critic. - Nile Rodgers


  1. Judging yourself is only bad if you let it stop there. If it brings you to change or forgiveness then it was ultimately for your own best good.

    1. The big difference is whether you're judging fairly or harshly. A lot of people seem to be more inclined to judge harshly.

  2. It's almost too easy to pass judgement without knowing much about a person. I try hard to keep an open mind and not create judgement until I have something concrete to base it on! Good post! Happy A-to-Z 2013! ~Angela, Whole Foods Living,

  3. The Good Word tells us: "Judge not, let ye be judged by the same judgment." That's good enough for me.
    However, that being said, judging others is simply a part of human nature, and Jesus told us not to judge because He knew how difficult it is.
    Good post. Thanks. Best regards to you. Ruby

    1. That it does, and while I try to steer away from pushing my own religious beliefs on the blog that is one of the phrases I always try to keep in mind. :)