Friday, September 7, 2012

Just a little bit more...

It's almost hard to believe that I am coming up on another big weight loss milestone. I only just dropped out of the '2's and into the '1's. Now, I am approaching a goal that seemed incredibly far away from the last one. In reality though, it is only a difference of 10lbs.

This coming weigh-in or the next one I will hit the 50lb mark. Yeah, it blows my mind. That is a number that always makes me go "wow". I have be honest that there was a large part of me that wasn't sure I could do it. That I could achieve the 50lb gone mark.

At that point I will only have 20lbs left to go. I know the last 10 and 20 can be the some of the hardest pounds to get rid of, but I'm okay with that. What bothers me more is one thing -

Will I know when I am done?

I have a goal in mind. 170lbs. I call it my reassessment weight. It may seem like a high number to a lot of you, but I also measure in at 5'10" and I'm not built small. My sister, at only an inch shorter, has such a small bone structure that 130 is a good weight for her.

I'm a little afraid that when I hit that point and look in the mirror, I won't see what others see. I'll still see me as being overweight. I won't be able to objectively judge if I need to push myself for another 5 or 10 lbs. Will I be able to look and go - I'm done now. Time build myself back up with muscle instead of fat.

Of course, with a focus on weight training, I know my body will continue to change, but I still worry about what I am going to see in that mirror. What if I can't see it? What if I just keep telling myself "just a little bit more..."


  1. I think that's something everybody struggles with when they've lost a significant amount of weight. You still have the same eyes, hair, and skin and I think it takes a long time to stop thinking of yourself as "the fat one" and stop thinking like, "I still need to lose weight."

    I mean, it's been years since I surpassed the 200 mark and then dropped to my current weight (it's also an approx 50 lbs weight loss for me), but I still feel like I could lose a few extra pounds.

    I also see how it's easy to become obsessed and stress out about everything you put in your mouth because you don't want to gain the weight back (it's almost like we were less stressed with more fat, haha...), but I think you've done it right. You've lost the weight slowly and made some lifestyle changes instead of just going on the 21 day diet, lost 40 pounds and the next month gained half of it back.

    So I'm pretty sure you'll do well in reaching your goal, re-evaluating, and setting your next one, whether it's weight loss or maintaining a beauty regime, lol. :D

    1. Thanks, it's good to know I'm not alone...and I hope I do well, although right now it feels like it'll take me another year to get the last 20!

  2. I think what you are struggling with is normal. We've all been there. I tend to figure it out when I do the first revision. Good luck.
    I stopped in from the chocolate blogfest, but I'm probably a little early. I'll try back later.

    1. Yup, you're a bit early, but it's up now. I tend to be a late starter and I didn't have time to do my post till I got to work this morning.

      And thanks. I hope I figure it out!